This year my company is offering to sponsor any employee who wants to participate in Step Out to Fight Diabetes by contributing $100 per participant.
On the one hand, diabetes is rampant in my family and contributed significantly to the death of my mother. Furthermore, I have enough risk factors for diabetes (excess weight, family history, PCOS, and probably insulin resistance, though I’ve never been tested) that I have a very personal interest in research into the causes, prevention, and treatment of diabetes.
On the other hand, I am no big fan of the American Diabetes Association. I have said it before, and I’ll say it again: if you wanted to devise a diet that would cause a diabetic to die a slow, miserable death, you couldn’t do better than the diet currently recommended by the ADA. In fact, as more time passes since my mother’s death nearly four years ago, I am more and more haunted by the suspicion that the ADA diet, with it’s “carbs are the healthiest thing for you” nonsense, hastened her death, especially in her later years, when she was dependent on public agencies, like Meals On Wheels and the nursing home where she spent her final months, for all her meals. The public agencies stuck to the party line dished out by the ADA, and fed my mother a non-stop stream of carbs, with little fat and protein to balance them out. And not only do I believe this hastened her death, I think that it caused her undue psychological distress. I remember numerous occasions when my mother was in tears because she had to follow some complex insulin dosing schedule and her blood sugar was still wildly out of control! The routine was, a finger stick four times a day before each meal and a bedtime snack; some variable amount of insulin based on the blood sugar reading, and then the meal or snack, which was usually something like 3 skimpy ounces of low-fat turkey breast on white bread with mustard, hold the mayo, 8 oz of skim milk, 6 oz of juice, and a little pile of overcooked vegetable, which was often a starchy one like carrots or peas or corn with a teaspoon of some horrifying trans fat laden margarine. (Sometimes, and I wish I were lying, she’d get an actual donut in her Meals On Wheels lunch bag! You know, a donut - a little wad of starch and sugar fried in trans fat. I’m not sure why they didn’t send her a cyanide capsule, too. But the ADA said an occasional donut was OK, so it must’ve been OK.) Repeat before next meal or snack. It was extremely complicated, and it didn’t work. My mother’s blood sugar levels were all over the place, either soaring over 200 (and sometimes over 300) or dropping so low that my local siblings felt the need to call her several times a day in case she passed out. (This happened many, many times. It’s a miracle she never hit her head or broke a bone.) The most insane part of this, other than the fucking donuts, is that they actually gave her skim milk and juice at the same meal, two liquids that are so high in sugar that they are given to diabetics whose blood sugar has dropped too low due to excess insulin dosage. Or maybe the most insane part of this was that her recommended bedtime snack was two Graham crackers and 8 oz. of skim milk. In retrospect, there were so many insane things that it’s hard to decide which is craziest. Do you feel, as I do, like you’ve gone down the rabbit hole?
Four finger sticks and four insulin shots a day (”I feel like a goddamn pincushion,” she used to say), and she still lived in fear of passing out and not being found until it was too late, or being hospitalized with a blood sugar higher than the Hancock Tower. She was scared and very frustrated. And like many people of her generation, she was a very compliant person and considered her doctor (who was an ass, but that’s another story) to be an authority figure. She did she was told, and her diabetes will still raging out of control. If I had a nickel for every time I heard my mother wail, “What am I doing wrong?” I could buy Microsoft outright.
If this diet is the best thing for a diabetic, why did my mother spend her last years in physical and psychological misery? And why, in the 70s and early 80s, when the ADA diet was much more sensible and balanced, with a moderate fat and protein content and a lower carb content, did she manage her diabetes pretty well with a single daily insulin shot of a dose that seldom varied? And this in spite of the fact that insulin delivery technology wasn’t as advanced, we didn’t have a distinction between slow- and fast-acting insulin, and people monitored their sugar by testing their urine instead of their blood? She wasn’t exactly the picture of health then, but she did a lot better than she did in the last decade of her life.
The worst part for me is that I played along with the expert recommendations. At the time, I didn’t know any better, didn’t know how carbs and insulin interact, didn’t know protein’s regulating effect on blood sugar, didn’t know that natural fats are good for virtually everyone, and had never heard of trans fats but thought margarine was healthier than butter and Crisco oil was better than olive oil. I’ll always feel some guilt about this. But how could I have known?
I’m not a scientist, just a layperson who takes an interest in nutrition; and I know that to blame my mother’s problems solely on her diet would be inaccurate. I know that everyone’s metabolism slows with age, and the diet that worked for her when she was 50 would’ve needed some adjustment when she was 70. And I know that her stubborn insistence on smoking (the doctor never told her to give it up, and I’m convinced that if he had, she would’ve - one of the many reasons that I think he was an ass) also contributed to her untimely demise. But I can’t help thinking that, even if she had died at age 73, she might have suffered less from the physical and psychological symptoms of unstable blood sugar.
So … while I’m sure the ADA is doing some fine things with its money, research into genetics and insulin delivery systems and so forth, I just don’t think I can, in good conscience, raise money for them while they are telling diabetics that carbohydrates are “the healthiest thing for you.” I’m considering borrowing a tactic that is used by tenants who have disputes with their landlords - write a letter to the ADA saying that I am escrowing my contributions to them, to be released when they devise a more sensible set of dietary guidelines. If this does not happen before my death, the money will be willed to another charity. (Or heck, maybe I’ll skip the escrow and just give the money to the Weston A. Price Foundation.) And I’m considering sending a similar letter to my HR department, thanking them for their interest in helping address this devastating disease, but suggesting that their choice of charity should, perhaps, be thought through more carefully and explaining that, while I applaud their efforts, I simply cannot participate in a fundraiser for the ADA and I will be contributing $100 of my own money to some other charity instead.
The saddest thing for me is that we need an American Diabetes Association, need an organization that can marshal a lot of resources toward research and education about this sticky, sugary, killer disease. But if they can’t even get the education part right, who knows how much they are fucking up the research?